Tuesday, November 18, 2014

How to get through the holidays with family that you don't really want to be around. Auto Writing Post 6

What have I been up to? I've been working on transcribing the footage from all the interviews. I have this program that basically transcribes it for you but it messes up just enough to make it a ton of work re-editing it. However it does help in organizing the footage itself.

This week I have a meeting with my publisher, my friend Tooke to get going on making some changes to her feature film, and with the lovely Sondra who I interviewed exactly 2 years ago. Plus more doctor appointments for me and the kids.

I have a feeling of dread for the holidays. I'm still working through these feelings of people issues. Lately, to be honest, I have not really been enjoying any time we spend with my husband's family. When the kids were little getting all the nieces and nephews together to visit was great. But now that the kids are getting bigger and we realize that all the parenting styles are so very different I don't want my kids learning bad habits from their cousins. Not only that but when I am with Enrique's family as a group, I feel more alone than being alone. I just can't seem to connect to them anymore.  I'm tired of trying to force something that doesn't happen naturally.

I care deeply for his brothers and sisters, and I do like one of my non related brother in laws. But everyone else that is only related by marriage, I just can't seem to want to be around them anymore.

I'm going to ask what the other side thinks about this.

Q. Dear God, I don't really want to be around my husband's family anymore, and I know that to make my husband happy I should want to be around his family but I just don't feel like it.  Please give me some advice about this.

A. In the thinking of formality and how to treasure your family, you are not talking directly about connections. You are referring to obligation. You are referring to the feeling of arbitrary relationships. They are meant to be in your life for a purpose but you must find the purpose on an individual basis, you cannot lump all the people into one group. We as souls belong together. But as a family you cannot address the people as a whole you must connect individually to determine how you can be of service.