Wednesday, April 27, 2011

What were you thinking about this morning? Lesson 11 to 12

My scar from My thyroid surery... healing up but still visible
So I love my camera... so ... I want to marry it. So much when I see an ad in the magazine for it I want to kiss it.  The below Amazon ad is priced over what I paid. I got mine for $888. sans lenses. ... Thats one thing I was thinking about this morning...I swear I must think about at the very least 5 things a minute.  Sometimes maybe 100 things in a one minute. I think about philosophical shit. Mundane shit.Loving thoughts. Petty stuff. I was thinking about thinking this morning. I was thinking about which things we think about that are  a waste of time. Such as comparisons, how often do we spend time comparing ourselves to other people in our heads. They have a better or worse art. They are nicer or snobbier then we are. They are fatter or skinnier or the same as we are. They are younger, more attractive, smarter, dumber, more wealthy, poorer, more spiritual, more opinionated.  I mean, I really try not to do that, but I do. Isn't that a huge struggle? Those are all definitely wasted thoughts that could be put to better use.  And another thing..... you see that picture of my neck. Why did they have to make that scar (from last September) not centered?  And I'm not sure if you can see it, but underneath it just looks like a blemish its not its a red dot (scar). why did they have to poke a hole in my neck right there for drainage? Can't they tell I already have blotchy skin....?  That thought is vanity right?   Another useless thought I have.... is when I was younger, thinner, and better looking I used to get special treatment. I've just realized this in the past few weeks.  I've realized I used to get special treatment, because I don't get it anymore.  But the truth is, if you are young, large breasted and not terribly fat, and pretty to go along with it... you get special treatment. Since I hit 40... I just don't get it anymore. Isn't that weird that I got special treatment for 30 years and didn't know it? Example people do nice things for no reason, smile for no reason, give me free stuff, let me in for free.  Do you know I got free weed for 20 years. I only had to buy it like 10 times and people just gave it to me.  I didn't use much but I always had a piece put away in case I wanted it one day.  More and more useless thoughts. Ok. Course in Miracles I am at your mercy! Please help me stop all this drivel that is running through my head on an average day.  I succumb to you. I understand that "My meaningless thoughts are showing me a meaningless world" (lesson 11 by the way.)

Lesson 12: I am upset because I see a meaningless world. Taken from the course in Miracles.
Description: "The importance of this idea lies in the fact that it contains a correction for a major perceptual distortion. You think that what upsets you is a frightening world, a sad world, a violent world, or an insane world. All these attributes are given it by you. The world is meaningless in itself."

Keeping an even tempo look around you, what you see does not matter, as you look around you evenly say " I think I see a fearful world, a dangerous world, a hostile world, a sad world, a wicked world, a crazy world" Or whatever descriptions occur to you, even if you think positive descriptions. then say to yourself "but I am upset because I see a meaningless world"
It describes this saying that "what is meaningless is not good or bad, so why does a meaningless world upset you? "

do this 3 or 4 times.

My interpretation: Again and again it is basically getting us aware of our useless thoughts in order to let true god thoughts come in. It acknowledges that this may upset you by thinking it is a meaningless world but that once you can have pure thoughts you will be very happy. You know I've done these lessons before and I agree with them, I know where they are going. However, I must acknowledge the first times I did these it was scary. Because at the time I didn't know where it was going. Now I know what it is going for is to truely get you aware of how much wasted energy goes into these ego thoughts and thoughts that think the world comes first and we perceive it. What it is teaching is that what we think comes first and then our world.