So needless to say I started drinking a little more than usual. I have drank like 6 times in the last 2 weeks, which is a very large amount for me. I've been trying to release that stress. The other thing I've been doing other than green is reading my course in Miracles.
It doesn't really matter what spiritual path you take for your life... clearing your mind of junk really works, thinking positively really works to make miracles.
So back to where I started here, I have been remembering that everyone is me. I mean I am the driver of my own universe so everyone I see and how I perceive them is all me. I prayed to have a positive experience at college and already, I feel the kindness. The guilt I was feeling, according to my reading has no place. That's up to you whether you believe in guilt or not but The Course in Miracles clearly says that guilt is just another crutch of the ego. And personally I really like the concepts. Today I started my lessons from the course in miracles that tries to help you re - learn how to think with pure love and forgiveness, its starts very plain..
I remember years ago when I first did this exercise it must have been 10 years ago. I felt a little lost with it. Like ... "what do you mean it has no meaning" but when I did this process in 2009 when I moved back from mexico, time actually collapsed and gave me everything I wanted at about the daily lesson 32. There are 365 lessons, and it is one of those things where if you are ready for it you are... if you are not you're not, when the student is ready the teacher will appear.
However, in the very least - if - you want to be happier - the first step you can do is to realize that all our hopes and frustrations are projected onto everything we see, if you can stay positive in your mind, your entire world will change. We hear and read it over and over and over but you just have to commit yourself to it - you can do it!