Tuesday, December 22, 2009

todays "A course in Miracles" lesson

This photo is by my school in Downtown Portland about a week before school got out. It must have been about 15 outside that day.

So I started doing "A Course in Miracles" last year at my lowest point in PV. I never brought the blog up to date to that point in my spiritual journey stories. I still plan to finish writing that segment... but as of right now I just wanted to skip forward to where I am now.

Where I am is in a sort of sucky place. I have found that when I do not do my daily spiritual practice I slowly subside into this place... of grumpiness, and I focus on my health, or lack of...good health, and I feel justified in my grumpiness. And I send out negative thoughts to the universe. I find out I am mad at people and I don't even really know why. Or if I think about it I will come up with reasons. I've been thinking for days and days, maybe even weeks that I need to get back to my spiritual practice. But every night before I close my eyes I try to do a meditation and I think I barely get started with it and I fall asleep.

Honestly, why is it when I get very busy, the first thing I DON'T do is my spiritual practice?When my spiritual practice reverberates into my entire life, it must and should be one of my highest priorities. I need to do atleast 30 minutes a day.

So today finally I have shaken the stress from school off. Its been a week since my last class and I have finally shaken it. I slept in as long as the little ones would let me... till about 8am ... and then laid there in bed trying to sleep, but have you ever refereed while trying to sleep. You can't sleep and you can't referee. So then amazingly.... I picked up my "A Course in Miracles" and went right back to where I left off at. Lesson 124. and what is amazing to me is that the children were quiet the entire time I read my 2 page lesson.

And... the lesson was very pertinent to where I am now. Again, they say, when the student is ready the teacher will appear. I love that quote.

I am going to paraphrase some of my lesson today. It is entitled

LESSON 124 "Let me remember I am one with God"

Today we will again give thanks for our Identity in God.
our home is safe, protection guaranteed in all we do,
power and strength available to us in all our undertakings.

I really needed to hear that right now. I mean, I already know that but I just needed the book to tune into me. Sometimes I feel like the book is rewritten and there for me to specifically speak to what I am going through.
We can fail in nothing.
Everything we touch takes on a shining
light that blesses and that heals.

I try so hard to remember that but it is very difficult, but when I do think that way, my whole world takes on a sparkle of magic that transforms.

At one with God and with the universe we go our way rejoicing,
with the thought that God Himself goes everywhere with us.

That is just the first paragraph. It spoke of anxieties in paragraph 4.

No meaningless anxieties can come between our faith
and our awareness of his presence.

I like to read that. I guess I like to read that because... once I've even gotten the anxieties I guess I have forgotten my faith.

Well, all I am saying is, practicing what you believe in every day is very helpful so that you don't forget. What ever you believe. It may not be anything remotely similar to this, and that's ok - to each his own. Its just that people often say they believe in something and then when the day comes (the challenge comes) and presents itself we can't even hold those ideals long enough to practice what we truly believe. It is hard work to stay true to our faith or beliefs, but I believe it is a necessary struggle.

I am trying to stay on track. I know that it is truly key to my happiness and well being. I wish you luck and pray for you.

The last sentence in the lesson of 12 paragraphs is:

"Let me remember I am one with God,
At one with all my brothers and my self,
In everlasting holiness and peace."

I'm doing my best to remember and practice.

Thank you god,

Puerto Vallarta Girl in Portland