Sunday, January 25, 2009

The elusive videos I've been squaking about, Melony and the big spin

It starts out dark but stay tuned.... it is so cool. This is from November when my friend came to visit.

Whale watching a few saturdays ago.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Blabbing my whole life to strangers

Written January 23rd, 2009

Wow what a big jump from writing a blog spilling my entire life out onto the internet pages of blogspot to being on the phone and telling any complete stranger from anywhere near where I am from about my life. I guess it isn't really that big of a jump.

In my job I am on the phone all day to Canadians and Americans. I am cheerful and helpful . I really enjoy talking to strangers on the phone doing inside sales. If I see they are from somewhere near my town... Portland, Oregon, I quickly say "Oh Washington? I'm from Portland!" Half the time they will act as if I've said nothing, the other half of time they bite.

"Oh Really?" they say.

"Yeah, Portland"

"Wow, what are you doing down there?" They shoot back.

I always say "My husband is Mexican."

"Oooh", they say.

I continue in the pause," And we moved down here to be closer to my in laws so that my children could have a chance to know their grand parents."

"That's nice." They say.

I continue, "And... it's turned out to be priceless in it's value becaue their grandpa passed away last September."

Then I hear something in their voice, or I sense something in their emotions. ..... a sort of that's sad and sweet and sort of congratulations that we were gifted with such an elusive priceless gift.

Who knows why I have to do tha? I have a problem with spilling my emotions on people.

Or maybe it is just to connect to people.

Don't we all just want to be understood. But I must say that though my honesty is almost a fault, being honest and heart-on-sleeve and raw, and intense, as I am, truly makes me feel alive. I am grateful to have the oppportunity to connect with people everywhere, and especially to all the wonderfull people here that comment on my blog.

And you must know, please know, that I read all the comments and I LOVE YOUR comments.

It is just that I've been working 6 days a week, I now write on the bus, and type it up on my computer at home and then I bring it into the internet cafe to post. It is sort of cumbersom for me to reply to the comments.... so if you would like a reply I always check my email *once every few days, and if you would like to talk to me, just email me at the same email shown at the top of the screen

We all live in the REAL world right?

Originally written on January 22, 2009

People are fascinated with weaknesses. Often focused on misery and suffering.

You hear phrases like:

- I live in the Real World
- You have to be realistic
- Life is a bitch and then you die

I don’t know what happened to me. Maybe I really was dropped on my head as a baby… (joking)

But, I don’t buy into all those sayings and philosophies, which to me are masks for:

- I can’t think positive
- I don’t want to think positive
- I give up
- I don’t deserve good things

Etc. etc.

Hey, this is my blog and I can preach if I want to. But one thing that is for sure, it is filled with my philosophies.

I guess this all just brings me to one thing. When we are little everyone always tells us that when we grow up we can do anything we put our minds to.

And I heard the other day, on the Mexican news that when Obama was a child in third grade he wrote that when he grew up he wanted to be President. As an American I think that we are all offered this assignment when we are in about 2nd or 3rd grade and probably about 10 percent of us say “I want to be President”. Well he did it! And that is freakin awesome! We all have that power to make a difference.

And I say the REAL WORLD is what you make it.

I'd like to order some perspective please?

Originally written on January 21, 2009 1:10 pm.

We stop at the light. I look out the window to the right where Walmart and Sams are. At the edge of the parking lot and corner of the large intersection there is a plump lady under a red patio umbrella. Reading a book, oblivious to the traffic and people walking by. Until of course someone is there to buy one of the many magazines or newspapers for sale. It is her newsstand, plastic milk crates are shelves and some newspapers are stacked on the concrete or pinned to the fence with clothes pins.

Up ahead I see 2 cruise ships in port. We turn left to pass Oxxo (like 7-11) and Soriana (like Safeway) and then some hotels. In the distance there are several high rise hotels and condos going up.

We pass newer outdoor malls with Chili’s, Subway , and Starbucks, then the river. Then more hotels like The Grand Venitian.

The bus is old, bumpy, squeaky, filled with mostly Mexican people of all types. There are students, and people on their way to work or appointments. Few talk.

No open mic today.

9958 it says in a few places inside the bus. The bus route is also painted on the front of the bus, such as many do with white shoe polish, when they sell their car in the US.
It says: Portales, Aurora, and Olas Altas - among other places

We see a small creek, KFC, many hotels of course, the Mexican government hospital IMSS, Strip clubs, dance clubs, Burger King, Office Depot, Blockbuster, Goodyear Tires, Oxxo. We pass the big central park, which I do not know it’s name. There is a track and baseball field, even a skateboard park. It goes on and on like this. Banks, stores, pharmacies, and finally the ocean with out an obstructed view.

Taxis are everywhere, all types of people on the streets.

3 days a week I work until 10pm . After 10pm my bus only comes one more time and when it does it is filled with drunk tourists. Obnoxious and laughing. Those thin clown balloons tied into hats and on their heads. They have name tags on their shirts and all incluisive bracelets on their wrists.

For the first year and one half here in Puerto Vallarta I felt like THEY do. Now the honey- moon is over.

I envision fresh crisp air, clean -rainy streets, and a sense of a sigh of relief to be home

However, I must say that I definitely recommend the experience of moving to Mexico.


Because often we are like Robots lodged into a corner, doing the daily grind, struggling with the same problems day after day, week after week, and year after year.

I SAY “Show me a different world! Give Me some perspective!” As an American I believe we (as a group) are truly arrogant and a little ignorant of what the rest of the world is like.

Perspective can wake you up and simply show you that the USA is actually a small country in comparison to the rest of the world.

Perspective can make you find new ideas, new ways that could be better than what you have ever imagined. Perspective can also help you to be humble and appreciate things that you had previously taken for granted. Small simple pleasures we are accustomed to. That other countries aren’t even aware of.

It can school you of what true freedom is, and make you realize that in the US we give up certain freedoms for the good of all, for the sense of safety and health we are accustomed to. Perspective can make you wake up and realize that mass media can program society.

But for now, I pass another bridge, the Rio Cuale, a large hole in the ground where a new hotel is being built. And finally my stop by the Mismaloya exit with only me and one guy with crutches.

End of the line.

Time to go to work.

Arrivaderci - someone please tell me how to spell that!

The Airplane

Originally written January 20th, 2009

Today is the last day of the pay period. I’m on the bus right now…. of course. My little slice of writing pie and visualization.

I’ve been working on doing visualization with e. This is one that we did yesterday… (it made us both teary eyed and overcome with emotion)

We are on a plane looking out the window, there is a pure blue sky around us. Enrique looks away from the window to see Jimi and Me, and across the aisle are June and his Mom, Maria. He looks out the window again to see some fluffy white clouds and then we are below the clouds and we see Portland. We see the Columbia River and we land.

We are getting our luggage down and Maria has June by he hand. Enrique has Jimi by the hand and a few bags over his shoulders. We slide through immigration easily because Enrique has his papers and Maria has a 10 year visitors pass.

We are so excited that we start running down the green carpet of the airport. I am wearing my red dress and red shoes and Enrique is wearing his shiny new shorts, wife beater and new Nike shoes. Enrique is pushing a luggage cart with Jimi on top and I am pushing a luggage cart with June on Top, Maria is walking along side of us, holding June’s hand.

We get out to the front of the airport and Everyone is there, my son Teal, Patricia and Luis and kids, Hugo and Vicki and ChubChub, Miguel and family, Lorena and Family, George and Family. We are all happy and hugging and crying tears of joy. We are home together with our loved all in once place.

Everyone is legally in the US.

We go back to Patricia’s house and our luggage is everywhere. The house is even more packed with people to come and see Maria and us. People are cooking and the children all gather around Maria to talk to her and hug her.

We are all together in the US legally.

The end.

Oh god make it so.

Thank you god.

Puerto Vallarta girl.

Thoughts of love - experiment

Originally written January 18, 2009

To find myself, my love, my heart, my spirit…I am blessed to have focused on the page of the book in “The Secret”. That page reminded me that the Law of Attraction, the law of love, karma, spirituality, what ever you might refer to it as, is about love.

It is about bringing good things into your life by being happy and kind and truly feeling love and understanding towards other people.

So this story I am getting at started way back when, I started a practice in my thinking, to change my thoughts. What happened was that I was working on being a positive person and I had my challenges, I mean if we are all honest with ourselves and really pay attention to what we are thinking we will know that it is a constant struggle at times to focus on being positive and leave behind negativity. It was around 1998 or so, I had noticed something that I was not proud of, nor comfortable with:

When I saw someone that was not average, such has severely heavy, disfigured, insane looking, really dirty, handicapped, or disfigured, I would want to look away.

At the time I had gotten an idea in my head to accept all people and project positive thoughts into the universe. So what I started doing was, when I would see someone different, or if I would have the urge to look away I would look straight at them, in their eyes if possible, and I would say to myself and in my head to them “You are beautiful!”

They say that it takes 28 days to make a habit. So after awhile something amazing happened. Every time I would look at someone that was different I would feel feelings of love and compassion and think, “You are beautiful.” However, when I would look at someone average, I wouldn’t think anything.

I noticed I was giving preferential positive thoughts to people who were different.

That wasn’t really my goal. So I began to make a point to think “You are beautiful”, to every single person I focused on. And after awhile, the entire universe became magnificently beautiful. Everywhere I went everyone was a beautiful person, and even if I felt uncomfortable for some strange reason I felt that my thought that I project were positive and everything became ok.

I felt myself being kind everywhere I went. After a bit, my karma was growing so much that people treated me kind everywhere I went.

Right now, right in this time in my life and am trying this again, to get back to that place. To get back to being kind and uplifting and joyous. I’ll report back soon.

Outtie, hasta, sayonara,

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

A REAL whale watching story... up close and personal

I get a perk at my work, I get to do certain local tours for free, to learn about what they are about.
I cannot get the stupid embed object to copy at this internet cafe so this is the link to the video:

So I actually did a whale watching tour. This was awesome! It was going out on a light weight boat that goes faster and closer to the whales. Once we traveled about 20 minutes out to the edge of the bay where the Continental shelf is, we saw many amazing sights. We saw manta rays, sea turtles, and dolphins, we also saw around 15 different whales, and if this videos uploads you will be able to tell how close we were. At one point I even saw a face. We saw many tails. Tons and tons of backs and the even heard their songs.

The whales are truly fascinating and really do sing like Dori in Finding Nemo. Booop high pitch, Blahh, low octive. Then they go boop boop boop short sounds high pictch. The biologist that go out on this tour are very knowledgeable and put the microphone in the water so we could hear the song on a speaker. At first we were skeptical thinking it was some type of recording but when they turned off the microphone and you put your ears to the rubber raft you could hear the song of the whale.

At one point I had chills and was overcome with emotion because it was so amazing. We were 1 of about 4-5 boats in one particular area watching the whales. And right down the middle of all the boats the whales did a parade and came up to the surface all at the same time and went right in the middle of us. In this video it shows how close they came at one point, and e is even saying don’t bump the boat. Play it again if you can’t hear it the first time.

Wow, that was truly awesome in the real definition of the word.


17 seconds of thoughts, inspired by surreal Puerto Vallarta.

Originally written January 15, 2009

Out on the street it is loud. Out where the vendors flow. The busses go. The people walk. The children travel.

This is a main road for this neighborhood. I am sitting on the far corner away from my house, waiting for the bus in this moment.

I love god.

17 seconds to organize my thoughts for 17 seconds you concentrate. 17 seconds of a smooth ride on the bus. Plentiful money. 17 seconds to think about prosperity, money flowing, deliberate….. expecting abundance. Because I must re-learn I am positive.

I expect abundance. I expect life beautiful, wealthy …. flow. I know it is available.


Dreaming and believing, our house is so beautiful. Thank you god, for telling me those subtle reminders. I’ve felt the need for appreciation. I am grateful. I have skills. I can survive. 17 seconds to say thank you. Thank you for letting me see my Dad, in the form of the same truck I knew him to drive when I was a kid. A bright yellow ford truck.

17 second of love and remembering, appreciation, and positive future.

Thank you time, thank you those seconds that flow. Those 17 seconds that replay.

I have succumbed to those 17 seconds.

That’s all it takes to change your mind.

Open Mic on the bus

Actually written on January 14th, 2009

For 5 pesos and 50 cents, equivalent like 40 cents US you not only get a bumpy bus ride with all sorts of characters, in Mexico it is open Mic.

This is an amusing fact that up until today I had realized most people don’t know if they don’t ride the bus.

So today the clowns came on the bus bursting my meditative state of mind where I was trying to envision love towards all people.

They looked off for some reason. Something not quite right about them.

There were several children of various ages, dressed in their uniforms on the bus this morning. I wondered of the motives of these clowns. Are they just looking for the free ride and tips for entertaining the bus.

They started their routine, which was loud and obnoxious and then I heard them referring to jokes about sex and marijuana. I was very put off and thankful when they were getting off the bus. Don’t get me wrong, I love jokes about Sex, drugs, and rock and roll. I was a teenager in the 80’s so bring it on! Sex is truly one of my favorite subjects to talk about, but with the children on the bus, who were surely able to understand even more clearly than I could. I did not approve. I thought it was unethical and upsetting frankly. When they asked for their tip I did not tip.

So after they got off the bus I tried to shift my thinking back into where my soul was before the rude awakening into my meditative state.

I saw a guitarist about to get on the bus. I was trying to get back to my positive state and fighting it, because the quality of the music performances can vary dramatically from absolute crap and not too bad to wow that was awesome, bravo!

So anyway, this guy gets on and I’m trying to think positive, think positive, think positive. And he stands in the middle of the bus with his legs in warrior position for balance, he has some wooden flutes tied around his neck and an acoustic guitar in his hands. And he starts to play, and it was so beautiful. You know my ipod isn’t working again, and he really was quite an accomplished musician. He was very good and balancing on a rickety bumpy bus ride. For some reason I was thrown back to the days when I would go to the flea market way back in the day on Wednesday in the 80’s with my dad and there was the ONE-MAN-BAND!

I just want to say thank you music man, Kudos, and thank you universe for stickin-wit-me!

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Whales in Puerto Vallarta

Well let me just start by saying we had margaritas the other night for my birthday with some girls from work and we saw whales from the beach.

Then I will say that my FREAKIN COMPUTER IS STILL DOWN AND I AM BORROWING MY WORK COMPUTER AFTER MY SHIFT RIGHT NOW AND ohh whoops I didn't really mean to yell all that, just caps lock was stuck on ... anyway more quietly my husband is waiting at home for me with spagetti. Yeah! and I have to make this short. I have all sorts of handwritten blogs all over the place but no time or computer to enter them in.

I guess all the worries about my work and me giving some type of insight into my work to the competitors may have been my paranoia after all but I am not going to write names or anything that could be mis construed.. I hope.

I do have a blabber mouth about how I feel and what is going on with me so it might be a challenge.

Just if some competitor is reading this I must say the following:

All the girls at my company work their asses off. And if the office is not perfect (which the new one is) but the current office is not perfect it's called LOW OVERHEAD, carried on to the customers.. that is the discount that we offer out of our own pocket. OK.

OK done with that.

I should have yelled that.


with me. I have to fill everyone in , in one place because I have to rush home.

and this is going to have typo's and mis spellings but I hope my readers don't mind, right now.



Children are good and I miss them so much. I am getting used to working 6 days a week now. But I still wish it was me who was at home with the kids. They already gave me a small raise and are treating me very well.

My birthday was last week,I am officially 38. And I was feeling sort of down and confused and who knows lonely. And I came into work and then my boss gave me my check, which I was expecting to be about 1000 pesos less and said they are taking my advance out little by little, then another person said to sit down as soon as I came in, that I messed up on something.

Then they all walked in with a cheesecake and sand happy birthday I think. I say I think because by this time I was crying so loud that I don't remember. I only remember that each lovely person gave me a hug and they were all saying aww.

We have been so broke that for my birthday I couldn't even buy a hair cut for around $4.

But things were ok.

Ton's of people have come to see the house. Yesterday one couple said that they totally want to buy it and even referred to it as theirs, while asking the realtor questions.

I know becuase I was sitting in the truck, I mean laying in the truck waiting.


Enrique got his immigration appt finally, but now we don't have the money to go. It is for February 3rd. We are going to find out if he is banned or not and if he is banned if we can do a waiver.

But the only problem is that by February 3rd I don't think Obama will have been able to get immigration laws changed so what I am going to have to do is post pone our appt. Until we #1 have money to go to it, #2 hopefully the laws are changed. We almost just want to go so we can know what wer are facing but I can't leave work and we don't even have the funds at the moment if I wanted to.

I am dying to go back to my city Portland, becuase I love it. But things are working out here too,I am making new friends... we had fun on Friday night. Just need mo money for mo margaritas.


gotta go, Spagetti is waiting.
puerto vallarta girl.

sorry about the quality of this post no time to edit.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

computer broke down

so I heard your guys comments and I want to say thanks and that my computer broke down. so I might not be blogging for a tiny bit, but hope not. thanks for your support. i'm at work, gotta go.