In this time in my life I find myself at a crossroads again. I have trouble sleeping. At this point, our financial situation has not gone as planned but we still have hope. I am DYING to go back to Portland. And Enrique and I have been struggling in our relationship. We have been arguing and talking about our relationship and about who we are and what we want. But it is clear we Both want to be together.
Today we walked to the store. The truck needs some work done on the Transmission and we don’t have the money at the moment to fix it. Luckily we are about 10 minutes away from the mall and Wallmart. The streets are dusty with sand here. And the roads are bumpy. Here they have a cobblestone type of road. Some areas the stones are packed with sand, other areas the stones are firm with concrete. (this is a picture of our street where our house is)
June and Jimi were happy to get out today. Poor Jimi, he has been very moody and I think he is sick.
Earlier in the year he would say he was going to go get a job and I would say… don’t do it, we need to finish the house…. But now the house is done and we have had it on the market 2 months.
Then no matter what I do, to express my opinions it is like I am turning a dial on him. He uses my opinions for a reason to do stuff and an excuse why he didn’t do something. I want him to show who he really is. Stop letting me dictate everything. And then blaming me later when he doesn't like how things turned out.
We won't be celebrating Thanksgiving this year again, but even so I am thankful. Thankful that everyone is basically well. We have a cozy nice house to live in. We have food in the cupboard, beautiful lively children. I still have interenet, thank god, we still have cable. And we live in a tropical paradise where we can go and hang out in the warm ocean waters when ever we want.
I just miss my family and my friends, and my city. And I hope we will be back soon.
Our DS-230 appt should be in January. But not sure.